How can I keep from falling apart after divorce?
Question: Will divorce and separation shatter my life forever?
Dear Friend, Here is what St. Paul writes in the New Testament: “We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.” 2 Cor 1:8-9 (NIV)
As Paul relied on God in his trials, you can let the trials of divorce and separation stimulate you to rely on Christ. Jesus will keep you from falling apart. He said: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”Matt 11:28-30 (NIV)
God hears your prayers. He can provide you with comfort and rest. God is not surprised that this crisis is happening to you! He knew that you would be going through a divorce. His very presence in your life will calm your heart and mind.
Allow yourself to feel the pain, and express it in healthy ways through journaling, prayer, and talking to close friends. Depend on God for strength to take on new responsibilities and plan new goals in your life after a certain period of grieving. Pace yourself.
Let people help. You can stabilize your life by growing in your faith and relationship with Christ through reading the your Bible regularly, prayer and a supportive church. You can build support with friends and family and learn to manage your money in creative ways.
You need not fall apart or collapse under the pressures of divorce and separation. Jesus Christ can provide the help that you need for inner strength and stability during this storm.
Get involved in a Divorce Care support group in a local church. Visit www.divorcecare.comfor all of their resources.
©copyright 2007 by Lynette J. Hoy, NCC, LCPC